eyefire | but don't make me your enemy

[ Sauron breezes past Adar where his uruk lies on the floor, taking Morgil into his skirts where the boy leans easily. ]

That is your father, Morgil.

He is ugly. [ The boy tries to whisper as if ashamed to be rude, looking doubtfully at Adar then Sauron. ] Daddy is beautiful.

He is only fair at home, [ Sauron explains, combing a hand through his son's rippling gold hair, eyes landing back on Adar, ] not when he takes any excuse to flee it.

[ Etelo looks confused but he loosens his grip on Sauron, finally breaking away to walk over the bloody floor toward Adar. He looks at him intently a few steps away, squinting. After staring at his face all over, a small smile quirks and the fearful apprehension melts away to be replaced with sheer joy as he opens up his arms for a hug. ]

... Daddy!

[He might have started a fight over that stupid fucking reasoning if not for their son's presence. It was a lie, Adar had not fled their home, he had been cast out. Having done both before he knows the difference well.

It hurts, too, to hear his son call him ugly. It is almost enough to piss off his master and lover and whatever else Sauron was to him and see if he can convince him just to end him here and now.

He stays still to not scare the boy, the only movement was his own green eyes that took in every detail about him. He is quite sure that somehow Etelo has gotten his uncle's nose, which catches him almost as off-guard as him wanting a hug while Adar is in this state. He of course scoops him up, despite the blood and gore, hugging him tightly.]

I have missed you so much. Every single moment. [Fuck your insecurities and jealousy, Sauron.] I am sorry if it upset you.

[ Etelo is surprisingly unbothered by the gore, happily leaning back to look at Adar's hair and investigate where it went above an ear. ]

Papa said you were coming back, so I was not so sad after a while.

[ Ahem. Sauron looks away. ]

When did you get into all these fights? Will you tell me?

I never actually left, little one. I was only drawing attention so I could plead my case. I will never leave you behind, okay? [He will fucking haunt this place if he has to to keep his son safe. Especially if Sauron is going to play dirty because Adar dared pay more attention to an infant than him, as if they did not have eternity.]

Papa wanted me to show I was still loyal and good enough to remain. If I am is up to him to decide. I will love you regardless.

[ The way the boy doesn't seem phased by Sauron having the last word in anything is smooth and unruffled as he glances over. Seeing his Papa nod, yes, Adar can stay, he tugs on his Daddy's sleeves. ]

You must have killed many of the uruks! Come, come and bathe! You must have dinner with me and Papa ... !

Many, yes. [Too many. You could kill a lot of people in an hour when you did not tire and were better, by far, than any of them. He doesn't bother to explain right now. Maybe when Etelo is older he will, if the boy is still interested in his dear old ugly father by then. He struggles to his feet, suddenly dizzy from the head wound that still makes fresh blood run down his back. He doesn't so much as press his hand to it to stop it as he walks with his son, too focused on him and not meeting the ground again.]

What do you like to eat? You barely ate anything that wasn't mashed when last I saw you.

Thuringwethil, assist Morgil's father.

[ Adar doesn't get to wobble around like that and worry their son. Thuringwethil has some tact, however, and simply offers her hand while placing the other in the middle of Adar's back. Etelo takes Sauron's hand so that he holds Adar and his papa's both, swinging them. ]

I liiike meat and honey! And honey on hot bread. Honey on anything is very good! Sometimes we have cream on our cakes and it is so thick it wobbles, like this!

[ Etelo's golden curls shake as he 'wobbles' his head around, grinning up at Adar. ]

[Never has he been grateful for a vampire to touch him but he will take the steading hand and pretend they aren't all aware, likely, of the gash in the back of his head that is going to add to the trail he will already lead. All except their son, which is what matters to him at the moment.]

Honey is delicious, I agree. Your papa sometimes gets me some. [Not in a while, but on a very particular night, he had. Adar smiles down at him, feeling happy and fair again even if he is neither by any reasonable standard. He really had missed him, and in turn had missed so much. He would be a man grown with no use for his father soon. Adar had been robbed simply because he had acted exactly as Sauron knew he would.]

I know you like it, we only have so much because of you.

[ The kid is really putting as good of a dent as he can in Sauron's Horrid Overlord vibe, having perceived the fight was between his parents still needs mending. All the way up to their homely chambers does Etelo chatter, filling the silence easily. Thuringwethil licks her palm clean when Adar is guided to a bathroom, happy enough with her treat when dismissed, and Sauron leaves Etelo with Adar as black wraiths, shadowy and translucent, begin to pour Adar a bath. ]

I see. [Honestly, if Sauron were a little less divine he could shake him.] I am glad you like it too. There are some very good soups, as well. [The only glances he dares spare Sauron as they walk and Etelo bubbles over like a fountain as from the corner of his eye, curious and upset and angry and wishing he could understand him better all at once. Or maybe wishing Sauron could understand him better, as he always claimed he did.

Once settled in the bathroom he looks at the mess hugging him had put on Etelo.]

You need a bath too, little one. It will have soaked your clothes. [Admittedly, Adar was the one that looked like an entire crime scene with legs, but he rarely thought of himself first when his children were involved, even less often when it was this child, this true, unblemished child.] We should not dally, though. [And he won't, quickly setting about getting both of them clean and somehow pressing together that gash until he either has a moment to beg? Kiss? A little help out of Sauron or stitch it up himself.]

Edited 2022-12-18 18:14 (UTC)

[ The spooky servants offer to bandage the head wound, at least, and Etelo is happy to strip and splash off all the gunk, redressing in the clean clothes the wraiths silently bring. He gives Adar a big hug before they leave the bathroom, kissing him carefully on a cheek as if nervous the scars will hurt when touched, then tugs him into the main lounge.

Sauron is not there, but there is food waiting on the little informal table where their family usually ends up eating. ]

Papa? He will return. I have not seen you in an age! [ Etelo grabs a bowl of grapes and climbs up at Adar's side to squirrel in there as he eats, liking the physical contact. Admittedly, if not from Sauron or the generals, there isn't anyone else to get it from. ] What is it like outside? Did you see the elves? Did you fight them? Papa says we must be extra vigilant.

[The little kiss is heartwarming, and he doesn't flinch, though much of his body always does ache when he is left like this. His son never needed to know that, at least not while so young. It would serve no purpose but to upset him.

He is not surprised to find Sauron gone still when he returns to the living area with Etelo, now clean and crisp but still no fairer than before. He almost feels like he might look worse without the obscuring black of orc blood smeared over him.]

Eight days, but it must seem longer to you. You barely walked when last I beheld you. [Adar says as he gladly tucks him close under his arm and tugs a blanket around his shoulders. He had often been cold as a baby, he might be now. Adar doesn't eat, he sits instead and untangles golden curls slowly and gently while he listens to his son.]

No elves, no. There is no one close by outside the walls. The Noldor will not make that mistake twice, little love. I saw only the sky. I truly did not run, I just knew your papa would finally turn his gaze upon me if he felt me leave. I did not know how else to get to you, for I did not know why he was upset with me.

[ Every third grape, Etelo offers one to Adar's lips. A kind (if still very hungry all the time) little boy. ]

Louie and Tilly have taught me how to turn into a wolf and a bat, just like him! It's very hard. I was allowed to read about Valinor too, and how great Lord Morgoth rejected it. I met him and he smelled like angry bees but he was also pleased with me, Papa said. Did you know bees make our honey? I want to see the hives but Papa said no.

[ So much imagination, so few people to have conversations with. He trips from one eager thought to the next. ]

Papa loves you very much. Is that why he can be so mad at you too?

[There is forgiveness in the happy babbling and grape sharing that he didn't know he had so desperately wanted. He doesn't entirely manage to suppress the laughter that fills his chest when Morgoth is described as smelling like angry bees. Adar cannot truthfully say he disagrees, though he makes no habit of being near the Valar if he can help it. Eru willing.]

It sounds like you had a very exciting week. I am sorry that I missed all of it. [he says, kissing the crown of his head like he has since Etelo was a newborn.]

I suppose it is. He missed my attention. [Bitch if you're going to hurt him over it he's going to tell on you.] It will be okay, do not fret about it.

I will not fret if you make up with Papa. He says he does not speak with uncle Lord Morgoth much anymore, perhaps he is lonely.

[ Etelo wraps his arms around Adar and cuddles him fiercely after the kiss atop his head. ]

Promise you will never leave us again, not to make him look at you or anything else!

[Huh. Interesting.] I will try, I will not make any promises that he will accept me. But I will try.

Etelo, I need you to understand this. I did not leave you. At all. I came up here as usual, the night you heard me sing through the door? And I was locked out and dragged away. When I came back there were yet more guards. So I left, only far enough to get his attention and then you spoke in my mind for the first time ever. I could have wept, being away from you so long. I could not think, or function. I did not leave you. I swear it.

But if you are gone you are not with me. Papa never leaves, he is always here in the back of my mind. I am never afraid when I am without either of you because I know he can See me.

[ He gently pats Adar's hand, as if he is the one who does not understand the little half-maia. ]

You are like the chair or the walls to me, I cannot feel you near unless I try to See too. I am not very good at it.

[He's going to choose to not take offence at that, because ugly and a chair was one hell of a nightcap to a shitty day.]

I think if I were still an elf you might have better luck, but I am an Uruk, except for the night we made you which is why you are perfect and I am not. [One of many reasons, anyway.] I can never be a maia, I was not born to one. I am sorry if it frightens you that I am obscured by my nature.

It does not frighten me. I am very brave, says Louie.

[ The werewolf has a good eye for bravery, to be fair, having slain so many fierce warriors. ]

Will you please sing to me tonight? Tilly is a little ... screechy.

I am sure you are.

[His heart entirely melts when he asks to be sung too and Adar gathers him up until he is fully on his lap, wrapped in his arms.]

Of course. Every night that I am able. [He is fairly sure he had sung to the wall in his grief at some point. And he does begin to sing to him his favourite lullaby, picking up the plate of food so he can pick from it if he is still hungry until he is not or he falls asleep.]

[ Etelo curls up in Adar's lap as best he can, making himself small and cuddling the snacks so he can nibble and nap at the same time. He loves music and song, inheriting that from Adar almost entirely. A little boy who loves to be loved and give it back twicefold, he stays exactly where he is until he falls asleep humming along.

When the sconces have burned down, a shadow breezes through the chambers and the bedroom door can softly be heard opening. Closing most of the way; Sauron gets in bed alone while leaving them to their cuddling. ]

[He waits, well past the time that dramatic shadow flits through the room but only so he is sure that Etelo is asleep before he sets the food down and carries him to his bed, tucking him in and kissing his brow.

That moody shadow is a problem he has to fix, for the sake of all his children (if he has any others left...) and himself. Since the door was left ajar, he doesn't knock but slips through the door and presses it closed. Whichever way this goes their son doesn't need to hear more than he must.]

My Lord? [He inquires softly, his bare feet near-silent on the stone floor as he crosses the room. When he gets to the bed he stops, but strongly considers just curling up in the bed with him.]

[ No one is ever too old to pretend they are asleep. ]

Edited (fuck it i'll leave it there lmfao) 2022-12-18 19:32 (UTC)

[Well, then no one is too old to be the little spoon. Because Adar sighs softly and goes to the other side of the bed and crawls in under the covers, and wraps himself around Sauron from behind, his breath soft against his hair and throat as he nuzzles there.]

[ Sauron stays where he is, a heavy lump of heat and molten-warm hair from a much-needed lava bath. Fortunately for Adar, somewhat only warm now. ]

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